From 'Suay' to 'Pakiam': The Remarkable Stories of Cross-Cultural Adoptions in Singapore
2024-12-12
Author: Arjun
Introduction
When Jane Devasahayam came into the world 86 years ago, her fate seemed sealed as “suay,” or unlucky, after her mother passed away during childbirth. Hailing from a farming family in Johor Bahru, Jane was soon given to an Indian family, a decision that would define her life in unexpected ways.
“On my first day with my adoptive family, my father won the lottery,” Jane recounted joyfully. “I ended up being affectionately dubbed ‘Pakiam,’ which translates to good fortune in Tamil.”
A Sociological Exploration
This remarkable anecdote inspired her daughter, Dr. Theresa Devasahayam, a sociologist dedicated to exploring Singapore's rich tapestry of cross-cultural adoption. Dr. Theresa documented the experiences of 14 women like Jane, who were adopted into Indian families during the pre-1960s in her newly published book, "Little Drops: Cherished Children Of Singapore's Past." This work sheds light on a phenomenon that remains largely unrecognized despite its historical significance.
While precise statistics on these adoptions between the 1930s and 1960s are elusive, Dr. Theresa estimates that they number in the thousands. “Many of today’s youth may not realize how common cross-cultural adoption used to be in Singapore,” she noted.
Personal Stories of Identity
Jane shared the challenges she faced while growing up. As a child, she often inquired about her origins, perplexed by her fair skin compared to her adoptive family's. “When I asked my mother, ‘Why am I so fair?’ she playfully told me it was because I had fallen into a tub of milk,” Jane recalled with a laugh.
She never did learn her biological language, Mandarin, but excelled in English, Malay, Latin, and even taught herself Tamil. Later, when her adoptive mother revealed the truth about her adoption, Jane sought out her birth family, only to find success elusive. Nevertheless, she expressed immense gratitude to her adoptive parents for the life they provided her.
Another poignant story comes from Madam Saraswathi Nagalingam, now 75, who also discovered her origins at 12. Growing up in a household of Indian heritage in post-war Singapore, she faced her own set of identity struggles. She vividly remembers the confusion and emotional turmoil of children insisting she was Chinese, leading to tears. To shield her during the racial tensions of the 1964 riots, her mother had her wear a pottu, a traditional mark on the forehead, even amid societal restrictions that discouraged Indian symbols in schools.
For many adopted children, the search for their identity intersected with familial love. Though Saraswathi grappled with her origins, she cherished her adoptive mother’s affection. “Despite the painful truth I discovered, I never brought it up with her again out of love,” she stated unwaveringly.
Navigating Challenges
Madam Thangah Koh's story adds another layer to this narrative. Growing up in Aljunied, she identified as Indian but was classified as Chinese when she sought a pink identification card at 14. “I was perplexed, as I’d never known,” she remembered of the confusion with identity. Eventually, she and her adoptive mother located her biological family, which stirred mixed emotions for her.
Cultural Contributions and Legacy
Today, these women stand proud of their identities, celebrating the cultural values bestowed upon them.
Madam Manoranjitham Param, a prominent figure in Tamil literary events, was also adopted in the 1950s following the death of her adoptive parents’ child. Her dedication to education blossomed when her father encouraged her academic pursuits. “I became the top student in Tamil,” she said, a testament to how her adoptive family's values shaped her accomplishments.
Conclusion
As Dr. Theresa Devasahayam, with over 25 years of experience in gender studies, emphasizes, these narratives are vital to understanding the multifaceted identity of Singaporeans today. “Each story is a thread in our collective memory,” she said, reinforcing the historic importance of documenting these cross-cultural experiences.
In a world that continuously evolves, the tales of these women serve as powerful reminders of resilience, love, and the intricate fabric of Singapore’s diverse society.